Ready to stop beating yourself up about drinking,  gain control over your drinking habits, understand why you drink and create a new way of coping?

Like most, we start out drinking for fun and socializing; to relax and unwind; at dinner parties, happy hour, and holidays.

Pretty soon, we drink at concerts, sporting events, book club - just about everything and everywhere else.

Before long, the “habit” has gone from a glass or two, to a bottle or two, and a nightly ritual, instead of on occasion or the “weekend warrior.”

Maybe you’ve tried to cut back? Moderate? Only drink 2 nights a week? Only 2 cocktails a night? But seem to fall back into the same old patterns…

 Now, you find yourself asking questions, and seeking answers. 

Quietly. Hidden. Googling "Am I an Alcoholic" under the covers.

Wondering if something is wrong with you. 

What would your friends and family think if they knew about your drinking behaviors?

What does it mean about you?

Maybe you live an otherwise healthy lifestyle - you work out, practice yoga, feed yourself and your family healthy meals, consume personal development like a boss.

And, yet you find yourself drinking when you really don’t want to.

How I Ended Up Here...

I was socialized to drink from an early age, by my parents and my extended family. No one's fault. That's just how it was.

Family gatherings, holidays, poker parties and Friday Nights out with my parents.

I took my first drink at 13 (peer pressure in a movie theater) and picked up the high school "Weekend Warrior" drinking habit at 15.

In my early 20s, I started my career in Aviation - a profession highly known and associated with the "party culture." First class, free flowing alcohol, and big airline parties. Now, decades later, I know many of us in aviation, and my fellow pilot wives, have pondered "where we are" with alcohol 

Somewhere along the way, I went from the weekend, social party girl, to drinking alone frequently, and then, over time, I progressed to a near nightly habit.

Somewhere around 2014, I started questioning the frequency with which I was drinking. And, then the amount I was consuming in one day or night.

A few years ago, I got tangled up inadvertently in a texting thread that wasn't meant for me.

But it was about me, and it was damaging, to say the least.

Soul crushing is a better word for it.

It created a reaction in me that prompted me to think more seriously about people, circumstances, and how much of a role alcohol was contributing to issues.

I spent a year numbing out and coping through "the bottle."

I would drink, wake up, beat myself up, commit to not drinking that night, only to repeat the pattern.

What I realized is that it resolved nothing, and actually created more anxiety, mistrust and confusion.

I took my first Alcohol Free, Dry January challenge in 2020, fell off the wagon for 4 of the 31 days, and learned a lot about myself.

Then, March of 2020 hit, along with shut downs and hunkering down at home. Happy hour got earlier and earlier in the day, along with binge watching Netflix and Prime.

In June, I poured the remainder of a glass and bottle of wine down the sink, when I realized I wasn't even enjoying it, and committed to take a break from Alcohol.

Since that time, I have participated in and run a number of "Alcohol Free Challenges." I have shifted my relationship with alcohol and now I control it, instead of being controlled by mindless drinking and regrets.

The #1 question I am asked - Do I still drink? Yes, but far less, and far more intentionally.

I don't like labels, so I prefer not to call myself a drinker or a non drinker. It creates a mind prison of its own. 

Forever is a long time, so for now, I enjoy the freedom and peace that has come with taking control of my thoughts, my habits, and creating a new self image of who I want to be; how I want to show up; and how I want to be remembered, and to remember people, places and events!

Join me and others, just like you, who want to explore and adjust to a better way of living, with or without alcohol. I'm not here to judge you, or tell you what to do. I'll simply share with you what I have learned, experienced and gained from my own journey.

Aviation, Pilots and Pilot Wives (Partners) and Alcohol

Life in Aviation has its own unique characteristics. It can be lonely and isolating. Even boring, at times. Long layovers in remote areas. Sometimes with colleagues you don't click with.

Little to do on layovers, lack of transportation, etc. This can all lead to a habit of drinking to numb out and quell anxious feelings.

The life of a pilot wife can be much the same and anxiety ridden. Few others truly understand a life that operates in uncertainty, sometimes day to day, week to week and month to month.

Social media only makes things worse, as we compare our lives to others.

Most commercial airlines (where I come from) get a new flying schedule each month and often with just a few weeks before the new month begins. This makes advance planning difficult.

Holidays are often spent alone and disrupted.

I know the tendency to overdrink at times like these to better cope with situations.

I know the trap we can fall into, from overusing alcohol in this way. Same is true of emotional eating.

I also know how to take back control, and live a happy life in aviation, without having to change any other circumstances outside of our own control.

Join me and others, just like you, who want to explore and adjust to a better way of living, with or without alcohol. I'm not here to judge you, or tell you what to do. I'll simply share with you what I have learned, experienced and gained from my own journey.